Monday, 17 March 2008

An empty shell of a life

You've read what she said now here is what she really means: (Free translation service provided by All_you_need_is_love)

Empty shell in the shade SMILE

My partially broken toe-nails and my weak lifeless hair situation is on-going. It is all the fault of those people I stalked, those I refused to pay for their services, those I bombarded with phone calls and emails and those whose comments boxes I filled up with my own brand of garbage. ALL,THEIR,FAULT.

I could do without seeing the 'goings on' on the web and in the press unfortunately I cannot resist reading them every day, after all they mention MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. SMILE. No-one forces me to read them, in fact some even go private so I can't but they are still leading me into temptation. I may spend ages commenting on them but they are libellous. Even thought they have not cost me a loss in earnings. I never had that to begin with. Never fear fans, I am still so in denial about the original stalker blog being deleted because I made false accusations against people on it. So that is all right then.

There is a whole team on the case for me.

Where the hell are the supportive emails I am entitled to?? Oh never mind, I’ll write them to myself. Might as well throw in the odd dozen or so comments while I am at it.


I’ll mention here the name of another blogger who has not written of me or thought about me in ages. I like doing this. HOW,VERY,DARE,THEY. With a bit of luck, it will provoke a row which I can use for my defence to prove they are all out to get me. Clever, clever little ole me. It is a ruse I have used over and over again in relation to the mob of ex-lawyers, doctors, the met, special branch, special trees, special gardeners, the media, men from Oxo-land, women from Loon Loon land, bloggers, poets, the RCJ, the whole of Cambridge, journalists, gap-year students, all the staff of DKNY, a burren of foxes, Sharon Stone, Clint Eastwood, The Eagles, Manchester United and a whole other cast of thousands on the internet who are all out to get me.

I continually wonder why my legal team (all 10,000 of them) have not had these people shipped to Guantanamooooooo Island. I must dictate to them tomorrow to do this.

I am working in awful circumstances, none of which are my fault. The solicitors insist on going to their country houses every weekend and I am here in this hostel. The sandwich supply has dried up too. Dammit.

Newspell: Thankyou, queueing, alot

Remember, all you need is love!