Tuesday, 26 February 2008

All you need is translation

Here is what she really means: (Free translation service provided by All_you_need_is_love)

ty :-)
Ed's note: As her sperlling and grammerisms is not the best (please note our own malapropisms in tribute) We think she is trying to say with this remark that she needs a tie. Please contact her via her blog to arrange delivery.

Well, thank you MYSELF, thankyou for putting on your new trainers and sprinting to my own defence on the Cambridge Snail uncannily fast after I finished blogging about it here. did you see how my lovely son was being subjected to sympathy (SYMPATHY, I tell you!) from lawyers, doctors, the met, special branch, special trees, special gardeners, the media, men from Oxo-land, women from Loon Loon land and a whole other cast of thousands on the internet who are all out to get me.
(Ed's note: Never mind, you are loved here, lfj)

By anyone's standards, that idea of mine to pretend to be my son in order to leave comments on an article that no-one had bothered with in weeks was well below the belt as well as the qualifying IQ for mensa.
(Ed's note: lfj, this sounds like a horrible organisation probably full of men and therefore best avoided)

However I don’t wear belts as I have expanded a bit with all the bueatifil, boatful, buertyifilll, ah fuddit, LOVELY (hic) beautiful cider I drink. This all harassing and no working lifestyle piles on the pounds you know. It also makes F. Jane a barmy girl.

However..... it's best not to go there, on the whole. Which is why I spend all day there commenting on comments weeks old.

I am a toe rag like any other and any woman who comes near my babes is welcome to a clobbering and a shoe-ing too. I will get the descendants of Jack the Ripper to carry it out. At least little Wally is still my friend. He sends me top secret messages on the back of Snickers bars. This week he told me I was as sweet as milk chocolate as well as confirming he knew secrets about the King of England (a King-sized bar – geddit!). I am not sure what he intended me to interpret by the frequent references to peanuts. Must research that one.
(Ed's note - Ahem yes of course you must, a girl must have a hobby and research is as harmless as anything)

I think I was hysterical (in fact I fell off the chair in the internet cafĂ© I laughed so hard –hic) with the one about the rest of the alphabet. Of course I want her to take other letters with her, the letters f-j and L for a start. There are some other letters I am forced to carry around, namely a-s-b and o. But I ignore these whilst I swim in Egyptian rivers fit for the butificious researcher that I am.

For information, however, R and R are handling the civil and uncivil case appeal at present, and there is absolutely no problem. On the contrary, they are being ab fab.
(Ed.'s note, are you sure this is the way you want to represent your lawyers lfj?)

So the editorial team here at All_you_need_is_love (all 3 trillion of us) give that about a week before they all fall out again.

Remember, all you need is love!